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Thank God, it’s not me, I thought as I climbed out of Joe’s truck. The next day I would continue with my self-centered existence as a college student.
Earlier that day, when I entered their home, Joe greeted me from his favorite leather chair. He was holding a 3-month-old boy, making faces and baby-talking with him. Killian, my 22-year-old best friend and fiancée to Joe, was in the kitchen, her clothes covered in flour. She was making tortillas for lunch. From scratch. Their son, Isaiah, nearly 2 years old at the time, was seated at the table with his cousin Kyana, only two months younger. The two of them were cute as could be, smiling and showing me the dough that Killian gave them to play with.
I spent the rest of the afternoon there, feeling strangely out of place. I watched Killian as she chased Isaiah around the house, scolding him when he misbehaved. I was in awe that she was the same person I used to get into trouble with back in high school. Now a mother and soon to be a wife, there is no longer room in her life for trouble. Or much else, I thought.
School was difficult for Killian and so she never had dreams of attending a university, but she did talk about going to community college. It seems as if those plans are the last thing on her mind now. I can’t say I blame her. As a student with work and other commitments, I don’t think I could manage all of my responsibilities if a child was thrown into the mix. Still, plenty of people do manage to fit it all in. I began to wonder how these parents balance school and family, and what motivates them to continue their education.
 |  | | Edward and Ciara Hunt-Arnold are both HSU students and parents to Caleb, 3, and Island, 2. |
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It is now common knowledge that children raised by parents with higher levels of education have a better chance of succeeding in school. According to the National Center for Education Statistics (http://nces.ed.gov), in 2000 more than 70 percent of graduates of four-year colleges had at least one parent with some college education. But, when parents are still trying to achieve their educational goals while raising children, they face extra challenges. Not only must they find a way to provide for their kids both emotionally and financially, but they also have the added stress of attending classes and doing schoolwork.
Kids on Campus
Robert Robinson, 32, is the father of Olivia, 5, and Danielle, 3. He is also a graduate student in kinesiology and philosophy at Humboldt State University. He said he found it difficult at first to deal with the lack of support for students with kids.
|  | | | Robert Robinson, 32, is a graduate student at HSU, and has two daughters, Olivia, 5, and Danielle, 3. |
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“You’re supposed to go to school, graduate, get married, have kids. If you have any kind of hiccup in your life, anything that keeps you from doing it that way, there’s little understanding for that,” Robinson said.
Ciara Hunt-Arnold, 23, a child development major and mother of two, finds that the university does provide some support. She cited the HSU Children’s Center and the kid-friendly computer lab in the University Annex. She also finds that staff and faculty are usually sympathetic when she must bring one of her kids with her to class or if an assignment is turned in late because of time constraints. Robinson has had the opposite experience if he can’t turn an assignment in right away or he misses class because one of his daughters is sick. He senses that the university just does not know what it should do to help student-parents or whether it even should attempt to cater to this relatively small segment of the student body.
Childcare Choices
There are options available for parents trying to schedule time for school, work and kids. The HSU Children’s Center offers childcare and preschool for kids aged 12 months through 5 years. It’s open all day, but each child’s hours are based on the parents’ school and work schedules. The center is subsidized, allowing for free or low-cost child care for many families.
The center is staffed by credentialed teachers and by teacher’s aides, who are usually students from the child development or education programs. Hunt-Arnold, who works part-time at the center, said they focus on each child’s individual development and create activities appropriate for his or her level of development. In this way, it is more like a school than a daycare facility.
Recently, the center’s Discovery Room, where kids aged 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 years are taught, was renovated. The new room is twice the size of the old one and will allow for more children to be enrolled in the program. Trudi Walker, director of the center, said that there will probably be 30 students in the Discovery Room starting next January. There was only enough space in the old room for 14.
Walker said that between 100 and 120 student-parents take advantage of the children’s center each semester. Hunt-Arnold is one of them. She usually takes her son, Caleb, 3, and daughter, Island, 2, to the center when her classes begin in the afternoon. Her husband, Edward Hunt-Arnold, a 22-year-old music education major, picks them up when his classes are finished.
 | | | Nicky and Mike Serrano make sure one of them is always available to look after their 3-year-old daughter, Aleya. |
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Finding childcare has been more difficult for Robinson, who has had difficulty getting subsidized care because of his self-employed status. He builds and repairs surfboards and also works part-time at Ramone’s Bakery. Currently, Danielle attends Children of the Redwoods Preschool. Olivia is now in kindergarten, and has been placed on a waiting list for an after-school program. Because of this, Robinson had to drop a class he wanted to take because there would be no one to watch her on the afternoons.
For Nicky and Mike Serrano, spending time with their daughter, Aleya, 3, is so crucial that they have arranged their schedules so that one parent can always be with her. In addition to school, Nicky works an on-campus job and Mike has two. They take turns driving each other to and from campus all day. Aleya has to be ready to go at any time, and they agree that with a less flexible child it would be much harder to maintain their schedules.
The Need for Support
It is important for student-parents to find support from other people, not just as baby sitters, but also as providers of encouragement and reassurance that they are doing the right thing.
The Hunt-Arnolds are surrounded by family and friends who help them remember they are not alone. Ciara, an Arcata native and the youngest of 13 children, knows all too well the value of family. Robinson said his main support comes from his partner, journalism major Rebecca Elston.
“She’s not the birth mother, but she is their mom,” he said.
Setting aside time to do fun things also provides a way for student-parents to relax. Hunt-Arnold has taken yoga at HSU since she started here, and finds it helps her relieve stress. The Serranos have become friends with other students with kids and they often take turns babysitting so that the others can go out. Robinson said the hours he spends surfing help him stay focused.
Sacrifices and Rewards
Students with children make personal sacrifices every day, often without a second thought. The parents I talked to all said their first priority is always their children.
“Your hair is not brushed, you’re hungry, you haven’t taken a shower, but your kids are bathed and ready to go,” Hunt-Arnold said, illustrating how a busy parent’s own needs often go unattended. Still, the benefits of having an education usually outweigh the struggles that student-parents go through.
“You have to ensure quality of life for yourself and your family. So if it means we have to have a tough time for a few years while I get a couple of degrees, that’s OK,” said Robinson. Seeing the smiles on his daughters’ faces and knowing that he’s able to provide emotional and financial stability for them makes it worthwhile.
“It makes it easy to wake up at 6:45 when I stayed up ‘til 3,” he said.
For Hunt-Arnold, the reward comes at the end of the day when her kids tell her how much they missed her. At moments like these, playing with them is much more important to her than getting homework done, but that does not mean she is any less dedicated to her education.
In actuality, the motivation that lies within these parents to continue their education is more evident than that of other students. The motivation is their children.
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