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Ask any group of college students and they'll tell you -- going to school is a full-time job.
Ask any group of parents and they'll tell you -- raising a child is a full-time job. What happens when you combine being a student with being a parent? You have two full-time jobs, little if any free time, but a full and rewarding life.
We've all heard about the benefits of getting a "hands-on" education. Parents who are also students learn that raising a child is as "hands-on" as it gets. Parent-students learn valuable lessons not only in the classroom, but in their homes as well. They learn to manage their time, make sacrifices and be positive role models.
For parents who are also students, it's especially important to learn to manage their time. They must learn not only to schedule their lives around their children, but to incorporate class and study time into their schedules as well. For some Humboldt State University parent-students, free time often gets lost in the shuffle between backpacks and diaper bags.
Chuck Hieter and Jessi Hobba are just discovering the joys of parenthood and the reality of not having any free time. Their son, Jakob, is a newborn.
Hieter has had to give up going to school for the time being in order to help support his family by working full time as a cashier. Hobba, who is a double major in environmental biology and zoology, cares for Jakob while Hieter is at work. On the days that she is at school, friends help take care of Jakob.
"I don't think of free time in the same way anymore," Hieter said. "Free time means I have time to do stuff with my family."
"There's just not enough hours in the day," Hobba said.
Even though she laments the loss of free time for studying and sleeping, Hobba said, "It is motivating to be a parent."
Sacrificing their own needs for those of their children is another lesson parents learn. Conflicts between a child's needs and the demands of attending school can often be difficult. For dedicated parents like Cynthia Stuart-Romano, the child always comes first. Although she is also a dedicated student, she does not hesitate to choose her child over her studies.
"It's important to me to be really present for my child," Stuart-Romano said.
Stuart-Romano, a graduate student in HSU's master's of arts, teacher of writing program, has had to make many sacrifices for her 5-year-old son, Dominic.
"There's not much time for myself," Stuart-Romano said. At times, she feels she's "shortchanging myself professionally."
As a single parent, she believes she doesn't have time to network with other students and professionals in her field. Because of her devotion to Dominic's well-being, she isn't able to attend such events as all-day conferences or even more casual get-togethers.
"A lot of the gatherings with students I don't go to anymore because they're not child-centered," Stuart-Romano said.
Despite the drawbacks, Stuart-Romano said she views being a parent-student as rewarding.
"The biggest advantage for me is that I feel like I have a really full life," she said. "I went back to school because I felt now that this one part of me was fulfilled [being a mother], the other part of me [being a student] could be fulfilled."
Being a positive role model for their children is one of the more gratifying lessons parent-students learn, as Jim Smith, a political science major and a journalism minor, has discovered.
"I think I'm a great role model for my kids," Smith said.
Smith has four children, but only the two youngest still live at home with him. Trillium is 8 years old and Brennan is 11. They witness his excitement over being able to attend college, and they in turn are excited to go to their own schools, Smith said.
"I view going to school as my job," Smith said. "I don't allow myself to slack off."
His children aren't allowed to slack off in their schoolwork either.
As a single father and a full-time student, Smith needs to be especially disciplined. This is another way his children benefit by having him as a role model. Because he is self-disciplined, they learn to be self-disciplined.
During a typical week, Smith drops his children off at school in the mornings, studies in the Library, attends his classes, and then picks up his children from school. On some days, he takes them to their soccer practices. They all do their homework together in the evenings, after Smith makes dinner and they spend some quiet time together. At 9 p.m., everyone goes to bed.
"Kids to-day are being groomed to go to college," he said. "They should be more familiar with what it takes."
There are no statistics available for the number of students at HSU who are also parents. However there are ongoing efforts to include information about dependents on the university's application for enrollment, said Trudi Walker, director of the HSU Children's Center. So far, these efforts have not been fruitful. Apparently, it's partly an expense issue; the cost of changing the form is too expensive.
There are two on-campus facilities that help provide care for children. The Children's Center, accepts toddlers (about age 1) to children about age 2 1/2. The center mostly accepts the children of students and faculty members, although special exceptions have been made for community members. The center cares for about 80 to 90 children per semester, Walker said.
The other campus facility is the Child Development Laboratory, which acts as a model preschool environment for children and provides a learning experience for students as well. Susan Willan, director of the Child Development Lab, said the lab is a training center for students with majors as diverse as education, psychology and nursing.
The Child Development Lab serves children ages 33 months to 5 years old. Children of HSU students, faculty and staff are considered for enrollment, as well as those of community members. According to Willan, about 44 children per semester are enrolled at the Child Development Lab.
With or without adequate childcare, students who are parents face many challenges. The experience of raising children, while earning a brighter future for one's family, bring spiritual and emotional rewards that are difficult to quantify in material terms.
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